I have never been a devoted angel follower. I didn’t search them out, didn’t collect figurines, prints, wall hangings, ornaments or angelic lore--with the exception of movies and TV shows with angels as the central characters. My mindset about angels was that they were somewhere “out there”, coexisting with us beyond our perception and providing aid in extreme circumstances. As far as I was concerned, they were doing their thing and I was doing mine; every once in a while those things might intersect. There was absolutely no awareness that these beings—whatever they really were—might have any relevance to my daily life. I didn’t know their names—with the exception of the biblical references to Archangels Michael and Gabriel, and had no inclination to pursue the “Angel thing” any further than that.

Many friends and acquaintances over the years have been Angel fanatics—they would ooh and aah and gush over any angels they saw, had prodigious collections of angel paraphernalia in their homes, and regularly included angels in their dress. You probably know some of these people—or may even be one yourself. Frankly, I never understood this level of devotion, especially since most of the angel fans I knew couldn’t really tell me what the attraction was for these winged portrayals of spirit. For my part, I could never get past the whole “winged humans” thing. It just seemed somehow off the mark, so I pretty much discounted the traditional depiction of angels and all the ooey-gooey sweetness and love associated with it. As far as I was concerned, that was the extent of my need to know anything about angels.

Then how the heck did I wind up as an Angel Minister, of the Order of the Seraphim? What did I discover about the genus Spiritus Angelus that changed my thinking and caused me to completely embrace the phenomenon of angels and their VERY relevant role in our lives? Through a series of events I am still not clear about, I was introduced to Rev. Dr. Kimberly Marooney, who in turn introduced me to the power, majesty, love and purpose of angels that went way beyond the role of mere messengers and guardians. After hearing her on a radio program online, I signed up for her Angels Path to Soul class. Here I began to learn just how many angels there are, how they are totally involved in our lives whether we know it or not, and what amazing resources they represent for every aspect of our journey.

As a Reiki Master, tuned into the energy of spirit, I began to “feel” the angels’ presence as I worked with them, and they on me. This first course was only the tip of a very big iceberg. The training for the Angel Ministry took us all deep within and without, widening our perception of the angelic energies, power and abilities as they helped us all to find and be restored to our True Selves and Oneness with the Creator—a process completed in months, which followers of traditional methods could take years to accomplish.

My understanding of the nature of angels would not be possible without the knowledge now available to us from the fields of Quantum Physics and Noetic Science (Science of Mind). They are beings and transmitters of light and fohatic energy (creative Source energy of the Universe), and only choose to appear to us in forms we most comfortably relate to—whether in wings or armor or a business suit. It would be impossible for us to see them in their real forms, which might closely resemble one of the energy beings depicted on Star Trek episodes. While it is true that angels are beings of pure love, they are far from being powerless pushovers.

Angels yearn for us to ask for their help, yet most of us—like my old self—can spend our whole lives never knowing this resource is available to us, or how to access it. Day after day the angels came to show me where my illusions and false beliefs about my life and my self were buried and helped me root them out. They took what I couldn’t release, tearing me down to the core of my being and building me back up to be whole and new—not always a gentle process, like pulling off a scab to clear out the infection—but always done with deep love and caring, for they know it is not easy to rise above the fear-inducing illusions of lack, infirmity powerlessness and worthlessness. These are all products of egos run amok as a result of our separation from spirit—a separation whose time has come to end.

It is time for us to ascend beyond the illusion of separation, to embrace spirit and our True Selves; to exist as a fully integrated physical spirit, connected and aware at all levels at all times. There are no better guides to help us quickly navigate the path of this Ascension than the Spiritus Angeli. If you have discounted angels as having any relevance to your life’s journey and spiritual growth, as did I, your soul has brought you to this page and these words to gain a fresh perspective on the importance of the role of angels in lighting your path to freedom.

Angel Ministers are fully trained to provide the direction and guidance you need to bring the power and abilities of the angels in to help you break free from the prison of your illusions, in an atmosphere of love, understanding and complete confidentiality. We have all been through this process, and are well equipped to offer you compassionate encouragement—we know what an amazing reward is waiting for you! There are miracles buried in each one of you, just waiting for your Lumin-Essence to shine through and break them free--bringing them into the world through you. Let the amazing love and light of the angels bring forth your gifts—it is time, and the world needs them!

Yours in Spirit,

Rev. Chris

These words from the Country song by Johnny Lee carry with them the feelings of loneliness, hopelessness, and heartache that surface for so many people as February's celebration of love--Valentine’s Day, draws near. I used to be one of those. In my twenties, February was always one long bout of depression as I watched my friends prepare to share the day with their lovers, boyfriends or spouses—to have that gut-wrenching feeling of being on the outside looking in. It was a feeling akin to starving while being forced to watch others feast. It wasn’t that I didn’t have friends or dates, but for reasons I never understood until many years later, they never wanted that level of commitment—even as a gesture of friendship. The other heartbreaker was the ones who broke off our relationships just before Valentine’s Day so they wouldn’t be on the hook—ever have that happen to you?

It wasn’t until I finally got totally fed up with the whole dating and love scene and decided that it was all about ME that things turned around for me, and I met and married my husband. Unfortunately, I hadn’t really stopped to think about the true cause of that reversal in perception—and I paid for it when my hubby became my “ex”, 23 yrs later. I had never really lost that hunger, that constant need to be replenished and validated by people and things around me—I was still “looking for love”. Which brings me to the belief that is expressed in the title above—that love is something we have to look for or find outside ourselves; that it exists someplace else. Someplace we have to find and feast, so we can feel “filled” with love.

Well, the end of that marriage was personally and emotionally devastating for me, but a real house-cleaning event for my spirit! Every particle of security I thought I had went out the window, along with a whole lot of false beliefs about my self. The rejection brought up every buried fear I had—fear of lack, worthlessness, self-hatred, physical attractiveness and survival. It challenged my sense of my value as a person, friend, partner, mother, businesswoman and leader. Most of all, it challenged my identity—made me ask, “Who am I when I take all these things away?”. What I found was that I didn’t know—my whole sense of self-worth and identity was tied up in what I represented for other people, and I was held hostage to their approval. It made me remember a quote about how we determine our identities from my college sociology class,

“I am who I think you think I am.”

Think about it for a moment and you’ll realize how true that is for most of us. That quote always stuck with me because I just knew it didn’t apply to me!

As much of a revelation as it was to realize that I had spent my life looking for other peoples’ approval to fill me up--to make me feel “good enough”, it would take many years of work for me to recognize and release a lifetime of painful events and false beliefs. The majority of this work was done at the spiritual level, during my training for the Angel Ministry. This deep work allowed me to see why I always felt “empty”, even in a loving relationship—I wasn’t allowing the love in. Like the majority of us who come from dysfunctional families, I received the message early on that I could never be “good enough”, and that love and favor would be held back until I was—which never happened. This message is delivered in many forms to so many of us as we grow up, and our egos build protective “programs” to keep us from the pain of failure or rejection when we are little—programs which are still strongly in place in our adult selves.

Year after year the patterns of failure persist, and validate our unworthiness, painful layer on top of painful layer—over and over again. Often these patterns involve our loving relationships—which are wonderful for a time, and then something occurs to cause them to end. When this happens often enough we finally begin to ask, “Is it ME? Is it something I’m doing or not doing?”, and the answer is YES. You are trapped in the pattern of unworthiness that won’t allow you to receive love into your heart, your self. The one place we need to be looking for love is IN US. Without self-love, we can never fully accept the love of others, and we will always feel “empty”.

Self-love is more than caring for our bodies—which is the first rung on the ladder of loving and connecting with your True Self. It is about self-respect, dignity, refusal to be a victim, being aware of and supporting your own mission first, saying No without remorse, releasing fears and the false beliefs behind them, quieting the voice of the ego to allow the illusions to fall away and truth to take their place. It is unlocking the Inner child and letting it free—layer by layer removing the bricks from that inner fortress.  Freeing your Self is the ultimate act of Self-love.

What would it feel like to enter into a relationship, totally confident in who you are, and not dependent on outside approval to feel good about yourself—including that significant other? To be in a relationship based on desire and respect instead of needy co-dependence? That is what awaits you if you have the courage to journey within and release all the lies, pain and false beliefs that hold your heart hostage and prevent you from reaching your spiritual potential!

With the help of compassionate guidance, you can get to this place—a place of freedom that is fully aligned with your soul. As an Angel Minister, and one who has been there and back, I rejoice at the opportunity to help others achieve the blessed release and resurrection that waits at the end of this journey within.

Maybe it's time to turn the love light inward, and give yourself the gift of freedom.